Proverbs 11:3

Proverbs 11:3 says:

The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity.

Every day we are faced with decisions that force us to make a decision. We can be honest and forthright about something or we keep our mouths quiet or outright lie. One decision will in the end make us stronger while the other decision will completely destroy us. Seems straight forward right? Then why do even the most upright seem to choose the wrong decision? Because it is easier.

The easiest path is not always the right one. In fact, it could be the deadliest. Let me give you a personal example.

I was on unemployment. I was also doing some writing jobs here and there that brought anywhere from $20 to $100 a week. Now, since it was all self-employment income, it was not being reported to the state for taxes yet. I could have kept my mouth shut and continued on. Instead, I checked the box that asks if I am unemployed. The result? My unemployment held for four weeks as they investigated my work and if it meant a loss of benefits. Those four weeks were painful as we didn’t anticipate the sudden loss of income. If we had not said anything, I would have kept on collecting. What could have happened if I didn’t report it? They would have found out and stopped payment for up to four months (as they did on someone I know who did this) as they investigated. Ouch! I reported it and suffered for four weeks. My reward? Those that knew about respected us more for it. We were an example to them.

When integrity is followed, it is not a bed of roses. Oh,no! It can be painful. It hurts when we admit that we were speeding to the officer. It hurts because there are consequences. Yet, it is worth it. Keeping quiet or lying to save our skin or get away with something might sound harmless at first or just plain easier. In the end, it will hurt us. We will face larger penalties. We could face legal problems. We could lose our jobs. We could find ourselves in a much bigger embarrassing position than if we had just admitted it in the beginning.

You have heard “Oh, what a tangled web we weave.” When we let a lie come forth, we have to create another lie to cover that one. Then another and another. The web we weave is what usually catches us and pins us down. It would have been much easier to confess in the beginning. You lose face, integrity, trust, and even friends.

A man was having an affair with a friend. When asked by another friend who had seen some suspicious activity, the man denied it. Over and over he denied it. Months went by until he was caught red-handed. His response was that it was nobody’s business and that he couldn’t understand why everyone was upset with him. He had lied. Why not confess to his failings in the beginning? Now, his friends were faced not only with his affair but also with a loss of trust. How could they believe him after all those elaborate lies and nasty things said to cover his rear? They couldn’t. Integrity is easy to lose and almost impossible to regain.

When you are faced with the decision to choose the easy way out or to face a little humiliation right now? Which will you choose? A little pain now is much better than excruciating pain later.

Proverbs 11:2

Proverbs 11:2 says:

When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.

Oh, how the prideful can fall! I was just in a conversation with someone about politicians and other people in the spotlight that always get caught in affairs. Did they really expect not to get caught? Yes, they thought that they were so smart that they could have an affair or even hundreds of them and no one would ever know. They were that good. How hard they fell!

Never assume that you have it all figured out. Never think that you are smarter than someone else. Never believe that you are the best. You will find disappoint in the fact that you are none of these. Pride brings disgrace.

For those of us who are not having affairs, do not think that you are exempt from this. Pride comes in more forms than you can count. It comes in everyday actions.

Are you the one who insists on driving and cannot take any comments on their driving? When you go off onto the shoulder, do you bite the other person’s head off when they mention it? Are you the perfect driver? Disgrace could come in the form of a ticket or the death of your passenger. 

When pride runs our lives, we fall hard. These lessons are learned the hard way. We learn them by losing things, position, and even loved ones. Is pride really worth it?

When you exhibit humility, you exercise wisdom. Humility means that you are not the only one who knows thing. Humility means that you might make a mistake behind the wheel. Humility means that you can accept correction because you know you might need it. Humility means that you are teachable and moldable.

Do you want to be a wise person or a disgraced person? We all answer “wise”. Our actions say “disgraced”.  If you think about it, you cannot argue this fact.

We act as though we know it all. We act as though we do not make mistakes. We think we know it all. We obviously think too much.

What we need to be doing is stopping and taking a closer look at our actions and words. Where does humility fit in? Does our pride push humility to the side and prevent us from growing? You cannot be the “perfect” person until you stop thinking that you are.

Proverbs 11:1

Proverbs 11:1 says:

The LORD detests dishonest scales, but accurate weights find favor with him.

This verse is typically interpreted regarding economics and money. Yet, dishonest scales can be found is so many other areas of our lives. God doesn’t like it. Our scales can be so dishonest. The scales of judgment can change from person to person.

How many times do you judge someone for an act and then excuse someone else because of “extenuating” circumstances or because they were a friend or family member? It happens all the time. Let me give you a scenario that might be familiar to you.

Trish is a woman whose life is not where it should be. She comes to church. She is involved and professes her love for God. The problem is that she does not see where her personal life should be held accountable. She runs through men like normal people run through socks. Every few months she is shacking up with someone new. Her fellow Christians call her on it and explain how wrong it is. They try with love to get her to see how destructive these actions for her relationship with God. Eventually, when she tries to get into leadership they have to be firm with her on her lifestyle.

Susan has been single for a long time. She has found someone who she has fallen in love with. They both go to the same church and are highly active as leaders. The man lost his apartment and could not find anyone who could take him in for a few days. Susan let him sleep on her couch for those days. Though they still say that their relationship is physically pure, they are talking moving in together. Most people are looking the other way because of their dedication to the church and that he sleeps on the couch.

How are these scales being dishonest in regard to Trish and Susan? According to the book of Titus, all leaders are to be above reproach and blameless. This does not mean that they have to be perfect. They have to be conscious of every action they take even more so than if they were not leaders. They are in the spotlight and every little sin is amplified. Susan and her new boyfriend are in that spotlight. Turning a blind eye to their actions is wrong and hypocritical of the church. To those in the community, shacking up is shacking up. Who really knows what is going on behind closed the doors? Why put temptation there every moment of every day for the devil to have fun with? Not addressing Susan the same way is tampering with those scales.

We have dishonest scales all the time in dealing with people. How is that biblical? Following God means being honest in all dealings.