How Selfish We Are

I think that we all can agree that human nature gravitates toward being selfish extremely easy. The last couple of days has made me realize how deep that selfishness is and how most people do not want to change.

The phone rings and rings. My husband tells me that it is the same person who has called about eight times already today. Why? Every time they have a single thought about something, they have to call and share. Whenever they get upset over anything no matter how small it is, they have to call. In fact, if he does not answer immediately each and every time, they go ballistic. When they see us again, they begin loudly asking why we never answer the phone and that they needed us. Problem is they think they own us.

I've noticed more and more how people are selfish about the attention they get. If they want to talk to you right now, it has to be right now. They do not care that you are in the ER with your child. It does not matter to them that you are in a meeting at work. All they care about is that they want you now. That is all they see.

Why are we like that? Why do we think that we are the only people on earth who matter? How horribly selfish we are!

The scenario that I have described might sound extreme and could only be the rare situation. Let me count the ones in my own life that is like that.... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 10, 15..... Shall I go on? They are family members, friends, neighbors, and coworkers.

I began to look at myself and my selfish acts. I do not tend to go the route of calling someone all the time and demanding their attention. I'm more selfish in my time. Why? Because I never get any and have to fight for it. But in the end I can be very selfish there. I want my time. I want the day planned my way. Ouch! Those stinking verses from James just hit me in the head. See how selfish I can be?

I remember the phrase, "God puts sandpaper in your life to smooth your rough edges." I guess I have a lot of edges to smooth :)

Teamwork is not a Myth

I had a wonderful opportunity to watch one of my son's basketball tournaments. Now, these were a group of fifth grade boys from various schools in the district. Most of them had played together a few times over the last few years and knew each other well on the court. In watching most of the teams, the predominant attitude was win- win. They coaches, the players, and the parents were all about winning. I was honored to witness something deeper.

One of the boys on the team would not be called the most gifted player. He began playing three years ago and fought being over weight. In addition to that he had been diagnosed ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder) which means that he could fly off the handle at any moment and flatten someone. His temper was horrible. Whenever he was on the court, he was benched and sometimes kicked out of the game due to his temper.

The next year he almost did not come back to play, but did. The other players tried to work with and the coach began to use a few strategies. Something clicked. The young boy began to really try to keep calm and work with his team mates. Most players would keep the ball from him and try to keep him off the court. These boys did not. They kept giving him the ball hoping that he would make the basket. All year long they did that.

This was the third year. They were in their last game of the tournament and the ball ended up in the young boy's hands. He just threw it up and with the most beautiful grace it fell right through the net. The stands erupted as everyone rose to their feet to scream the boy's name. The excitement was not for the team as much as it was for the boy who got his first basket. His teammates did not chase the ball back down the court. Instead, they ran up to him and jumped on him with excitement. It was not a matter of winning. It was a matter of supporting their teammate. As he came back down the court a grin was spread across his face.

Yes, I was proud of that boy for making the basket, but I was more proud of the other players for making it as important to them as it was to him. They were one entity and played as a team. I get frustrated as I watch adults act so selfish in work, the store, the family, and even the church. What we could learn from some children on a basketball team! It is not about us! It goes so much further than that.

Givingt More to Him

I had a unique situation recently. Have you ever had a situation in which you were put into a position that you felt totally unqualified for? That was me multiple times this past week.

I have several dear friends who are very mature Christians. They know scripture a million times better than me. They have more religious education than me. When they start talking I listen because I will learn. One of them came to me with a spiritual problem and I did not know what to do.

Here I was the person that usually goes to them and they were coming to me. I didn’t know what to say. My mind was spinning. I was not prepared for this. I was not educated enough for this. I felt like an idiot. They needed something from me and I had nothing to give. I just sat there. When I spoke, I felt foolish.

God is not a haphazard god. He knows exactly what He is doing. He knew I would be in that position, and He had equipped me for that scenario. I just was not prepared. I had not put on my armor and gone through my drills. I was the one who failed. He more than did His part.

What did I do wrong? My prayers were not there. I was not praying for God’s wisdom to come through me mouth. I was just panicking. My trust was being placed in myself which was a huge mistake. I knew that I should not do that, but in my shock to find myself in this position I turned to my human nature instead of leaning totally on God.

Here I am a minister’s wife and I stumble to counsel! Why? Because I looked at this person as being above me spiritually. I knew they had problems and concerns. I knew they had faults. Trust me, I know that no person is perfect or has it easy in this world. But when those that are more educated than me turn to me, I stumble. I am not expecting it. I don’t have enough faith in where I stand.

The solution? More time with God. That is the only answer. I need to pray more. I need to study more. I need to trust Him more. Overall I need Him more.

I am getting back into my in depth personal time with Him. I’m making the time. Life took over for awhile, but I’m giving it back to Him one moment at a time.